They cram you into these little apartments with rent figures that make you laugh, then they pave everything and give you a special place to go find a tree, but don't think it'll feel like an oasis because you just can't get away from that sound of cars going by on the other side of the bushes.
It's alive, though. Can't deny that. The density of humanity means things happen. They don't always go forward (a rocking horse may be constantly in motion but it never gets anywhere) but even under this gently lulling sun and blue sky, things happen. The Spirit moves. People touch. There is this sense of a heavy river of connectedness, if you are lucky in your friends, and a sense of fleetingly tapping into that life flow, if you are not.
If you've never lived in a major metropolis, I'm not quite sure you really can know what it is like. For instance, I'd love to live halfway between my work and my church, but it's just unrealistic. That's the most expensive stretch of real estate in San Diego (plus the worst traffic stretch) so I'd have to go way inland past the 15 to find something in my price range, and THAT would put me away from everything that grounds me in San Diego in terms of friends and activities, plus that's where the heat makes life not worth living, plus when you live in San Diego, it's just wrong to have to drive 35 minutes to the beach. So, I won't be doing that particular move.
In Acts it says they moved to the cities and the cities were changed. Come, O ye young and ye impassioned -- here is soil for your eager lives.
17 June 2008
04 May 2008
the best that life has to give
See, getting real takes a certain amount of thought and concentration. Fantasies and wishful thinking are fun because all they require is imagination. Realities, which can be both messy and rambunctious, demand work and consistency, plus you actually have to think about what you're doing. Bummer!
But the payoff on these grubby, sweaty realities is real pleasure, not this virtual reality junk, but actual, honest-to-goodness, living, breathing rewards that don't disappear an hour later when you open your eyes or turn off the computer.
And the deeper part is that your choices are imprinted on a soul that is eternal, and on people around you who will also carry on into eternity. Thinking and behavior have eternal effects, so think with your heart's eyes on what is lasting.
But the payoff on these grubby, sweaty realities is real pleasure, not this virtual reality junk, but actual, honest-to-goodness, living, breathing rewards that don't disappear an hour later when you open your eyes or turn off the computer.
And the deeper part is that your choices are imprinted on a soul that is eternal, and on people around you who will also carry on into eternity. Thinking and behavior have eternal effects, so think with your heart's eyes on what is lasting.
28 April 2008
sweet Sally
I googled "loving well" and stumbled across one of those gems of a blog that you would never have found if you were actually looking for it. Today's post is an excerpt from Sally's blog.
I deeply want to be like this when I have a family.
"On Saturday, we were getting ready for Easter lunch in which we had about a dozen people coming for lunch. Joy had peeled hard-boiled eggs to make deviled eggs. She then got a bright idea of how to make it easier, even though I had suggested the easiest way to fill the eggs. The result was a mess everywhere–I have never seen so much egg yellow on the hands of any one individual! How in the world had she managed to make such a mess? This at the end of a long afternoon of cooking and counseling another teen! She could sense how irritated I was with her! The Lord then gave me eyes to see this hormonal, young woman-my sweet little girl in the throes of growing up. She had “hurt” eyes as she watched me clean up her mess! Then I sat her down, and after having a couple of minutes to think about what I was going to say, I told her how much I appreciate all the ways she had been available to help me in setting the table and going shopping and putting up with the several hours of work we had all done. I told her that I didn’t always get my cooking right and how frustrated I often felt when I had put a lot of time into something like making bread or trying a new recipe, when it failed or tasted terrible. I told her I loved her said, “I am sorry if I offended you in any way. You are such a treasure to me and I know you were trying to do a good job. Thanks so much for all the ways you have helped me this week.”
The result was that a few minutes later, she climbed into my lap, all long, gangly almost teenage legs and all and said, “I am so thankful that you always love me, mommy.” a kiss on the cheek and she was gone."
I deeply want to be like this when I have a family.
"On Saturday, we were getting ready for Easter lunch in which we had about a dozen people coming for lunch. Joy had peeled hard-boiled eggs to make deviled eggs. She then got a bright idea of how to make it easier, even though I had suggested the easiest way to fill the eggs. The result was a mess everywhere–I have never seen so much egg yellow on the hands of any one individual! How in the world had she managed to make such a mess? This at the end of a long afternoon of cooking and counseling another teen! She could sense how irritated I was with her! The Lord then gave me eyes to see this hormonal, young woman-my sweet little girl in the throes of growing up. She had “hurt” eyes as she watched me clean up her mess! Then I sat her down, and after having a couple of minutes to think about what I was going to say, I told her how much I appreciate all the ways she had been available to help me in setting the table and going shopping and putting up with the several hours of work we had all done. I told her that I didn’t always get my cooking right and how frustrated I often felt when I had put a lot of time into something like making bread or trying a new recipe, when it failed or tasted terrible. I told her I loved her said, “I am sorry if I offended you in any way. You are such a treasure to me and I know you were trying to do a good job. Thanks so much for all the ways you have helped me this week.”
The result was that a few minutes later, she climbed into my lap, all long, gangly almost teenage legs and all and said, “I am so thankful that you always love me, mommy.” a kiss on the cheek and she was gone."
15 April 2008
opposite sides of sunrise
My friend and co-worker informed me today via Yahoo! Messenger (a very dangerous internet "tool" for work) that one of his upcoming tattoos would say "Suicidal Sunrises" - a reference to how he and his bros in his motorcycle group lived, loved, and worked like there would be no tomorrow. I commented that my blog title, Laughter At Dawn, was pretty much the opposite of that. Though both images revolve around the first morning sun, I felt like the first phrase was an ending grounded in passionate extinction, and my blog title was a beginning grounded in newborn hope (perhaps in spite of all reason). Not that I'm better or anything :0) Absolve me - I'm just writing a blog here.
It got me thinking. He explained that all that passionate exhaustion of self was done in service to each other, their families, and their callings. The dreamy, idealistic part of me really likes the thought of pouring oneself out at that level. The rational, pragmatic streak says calmly that since actually you probably have a while beyond sunrise to live, you'll probably best serve everyone by pacing yourself at a sustainable level and planning for the future.
And then there is the internal anxiety I've put on myself in times past (like 2 weekends ago) by thinking I only have a limited amount of time to process huge amounts of information about life and living and come up with airtight answers to the complexity and messiness Right Now. I don't like that pressure at all. It's bad and unhealthy, both spiritually and physically. For me, I think I'll take the long view of sunrises, and laugh for love of the beauty each one brings to light.
It got me thinking. He explained that all that passionate exhaustion of self was done in service to each other, their families, and their callings. The dreamy, idealistic part of me really likes the thought of pouring oneself out at that level. The rational, pragmatic streak says calmly that since actually you probably have a while beyond sunrise to live, you'll probably best serve everyone by pacing yourself at a sustainable level and planning for the future.
And then there is the internal anxiety I've put on myself in times past (like 2 weekends ago) by thinking I only have a limited amount of time to process huge amounts of information about life and living and come up with airtight answers to the complexity and messiness Right Now. I don't like that pressure at all. It's bad and unhealthy, both spiritually and physically. For me, I think I'll take the long view of sunrises, and laugh for love of the beauty each one brings to light.
03 April 2008
love makes room
People make room for the things they love - like photography, or a spouse, or children or work or alcohol or books or sports or sleep or God.
And when a person loves, they make room. Love steps backward and invites you forward. It makes space and lets you freely move toward it. It draws near, and makes room, and invites, in hope that you will choose to draw near.
And when a person loves, they make room. Love steps backward and invites you forward. It makes space and lets you freely move toward it. It draws near, and makes room, and invites, in hope that you will choose to draw near.
22 March 2008
love did it
Hungering for the Lord this morning, I gazed at Dali's amazing painting Christ of St John on the Cross and as I looked, I realized that Dali painted nothing physical at all holding the Lord to the cross. There are no nails in his hands or his feet.
Love cannot exist where there is not the freedom to choose. And it was love that held He who loves us to the cross.
Christ defeated death by death and bestowed on us life. He has invaded our world and takes back what is his - us - defeating Satan who held us bound to deadness with our wilful departure from God. And Christ did not simply stand in as payment for our sins, oh no, in defeating death he Himself tore our bondage to Satan in two, the action of one who rescues us joyfully. THIS is the gospel of the Lord - thanks be to God!!
Love cannot exist where there is not the freedom to choose. And it was love that held He who loves us to the cross.
Christ defeated death by death and bestowed on us life. He has invaded our world and takes back what is his - us - defeating Satan who held us bound to deadness with our wilful departure from God. And Christ did not simply stand in as payment for our sins, oh no, in defeating death he Himself tore our bondage to Satan in two, the action of one who rescues us joyfully. THIS is the gospel of the Lord - thanks be to God!!
21 March 2008
created to create... but to collaborate?
"Art is a right and human thing, like walking or saying one's prayers; but the moment it begins to be talked about very solemnly, a man may be fairly certain that the thing has come into a congestion and a kind of difficulty. The artistic temperament is a disease that affects amateurs."
-G. K. Chesterton
I would strongly suggest, next time you hang out with a cool arty friend, that the two of you try the following creative activity: try making a single poem, story, or painting - together. See if you can do the push/pull, edit/compromise, inspire/expand dynamic. I've done both the short story and the painting versions of this game lately and it definitely works your head around. Exercise your humanity! Do art with someone!
-G. K. Chesterton
I would strongly suggest, next time you hang out with a cool arty friend, that the two of you try the following creative activity: try making a single poem, story, or painting - together. See if you can do the push/pull, edit/compromise, inspire/expand dynamic. I've done both the short story and the painting versions of this game lately and it definitely works your head around. Exercise your humanity! Do art with someone!
10 March 2008
good taste
Sunday night I went out to dinner with a girlfriend and ordered a Thai mango chicken salad with this creamy mango dressing. It was a revelation.
That is all.
That is all.
07 March 2008
drinking your beer to the glory of God
I've been reading G. K. Chesterton's book Heretics recently (unattractive title, huh, but the man writes in such a burstingly joyful and robust way I just want to kiss him!) and this last chapter was on Omar and the vine - "The Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam." It's really a gorgeous poem, you should read it sometime - I love the bit where it says "A book of verses underneath the bough, a jug of wine, a loaf of bread, and thou beside me singing in the wilderness - ah, wilderness were paradise enow!" Anyway, Chesterton has some exceptionally clear and discerning things to say about this poem and drinking:
"The sound rule in the matter would appear to be like many other sound rules — a paradox. Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable. Never drink when you are wretched without it, or you will be like the grey-faced gin-drinker in the slum; but drink when you would be happy without it, and you will be like the laughing peasant of Italy. Never drink because you need it, for this is rational drinking, and the way to death and hell. But drink because you do not need it, for this is irrational drinking, and the ancient health of the world.
Some one called Omar "the sad, glad old Persian." Sad he is; glad he is not, in any sense of the word whatever. He has been a worse foe to gladness than the Puritans. A pensive and graceful Oriental lies under the rose-tree with his wine-pot and his scroll of poems. ... Omar Khayyam's wine-bibbing is bad, not because it is wine-bibbing. It is bad, and very bad, because it is medical wine-bibbing. His is the wine that shuts out the universe, not the wine that reveals it. It is not poetical drinking, which is joyous and instinctive; it is rational drinking, which is as prosaic as an investment, as unsavoury as a dose of camomile. ... "Drink," he says, "for you know not whence you come nor why. Drink, for you know not when you go nor where. Drink, because the stars are cruel and the world as idle as a humming-top. Drink, because there is nothing worth trusting, nothing worth fighting for. Drink, because all things are lapsed in a base equality and an evil peace." So he stands offering us the cup in his hand. "
Chesterton ends with Jesus's wheeling reversal of this: "And at the high altar of Christianity stands another figure, in whose hand also is the cup of the vine. "Drink" he says "for the whole world is as red as this wine, with the crimson of the love and wrath of God. Drink, for the trumpets are blowing for battle and this is the stirrup-cup. Drink, for this my blood of the new testament that is shed for you. Drink, for I know of whence you come and why. Drink, for I know of when you go and where."
[pause while the heavens open in your head]
Seems to me that Christians are all over the map on this topic of alcohol - some are extremely disapproving and consider it evil or at the least stupid to drink. And at the other end of the spectrum, some drink their nightly beer to the glory of God. I've never been terribly drawn to alcohol myself - for the most part I simply don't find it very interesting. When I do actively want a drink it's usually not a good idea because I know I'm already depressed. But I would love to be able to have the option in my life to go have a drink or two at a pub with my mates and have that jolly, vitality-filled camaraderie. It makes visions of Oxford and the Inklings and men in tweed smoking pipes dance in my head!
"The sound rule in the matter would appear to be like many other sound rules — a paradox. Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable. Never drink when you are wretched without it, or you will be like the grey-faced gin-drinker in the slum; but drink when you would be happy without it, and you will be like the laughing peasant of Italy. Never drink because you need it, for this is rational drinking, and the way to death and hell. But drink because you do not need it, for this is irrational drinking, and the ancient health of the world.
Some one called Omar "the sad, glad old Persian." Sad he is; glad he is not, in any sense of the word whatever. He has been a worse foe to gladness than the Puritans. A pensive and graceful Oriental lies under the rose-tree with his wine-pot and his scroll of poems. ... Omar Khayyam's wine-bibbing is bad, not because it is wine-bibbing. It is bad, and very bad, because it is medical wine-bibbing. His is the wine that shuts out the universe, not the wine that reveals it. It is not poetical drinking, which is joyous and instinctive; it is rational drinking, which is as prosaic as an investment, as unsavoury as a dose of camomile. ... "Drink," he says, "for you know not whence you come nor why. Drink, for you know not when you go nor where. Drink, because the stars are cruel and the world as idle as a humming-top. Drink, because there is nothing worth trusting, nothing worth fighting for. Drink, because all things are lapsed in a base equality and an evil peace." So he stands offering us the cup in his hand. "
Chesterton ends with Jesus's wheeling reversal of this: "And at the high altar of Christianity stands another figure, in whose hand also is the cup of the vine. "Drink" he says "for the whole world is as red as this wine, with the crimson of the love and wrath of God. Drink, for the trumpets are blowing for battle and this is the stirrup-cup. Drink, for this my blood of the new testament that is shed for you. Drink, for I know of whence you come and why. Drink, for I know of when you go and where."
[pause while the heavens open in your head]
Seems to me that Christians are all over the map on this topic of alcohol - some are extremely disapproving and consider it evil or at the least stupid to drink. And at the other end of the spectrum, some drink their nightly beer to the glory of God. I've never been terribly drawn to alcohol myself - for the most part I simply don't find it very interesting. When I do actively want a drink it's usually not a good idea because I know I'm already depressed. But I would love to be able to have the option in my life to go have a drink or two at a pub with my mates and have that jolly, vitality-filled camaraderie. It makes visions of Oxford and the Inklings and men in tweed smoking pipes dance in my head!
29 February 2008
compared to which, moonwalking is a redheaded stepchild
Ever heard of the Balboa? If you live here you're probably thinking Balboa Park. Cool beans. I love Balboa Park. But my latest Bal love is a dance by the same name. Check it out:
These guys are ridiculously world-class dancers. The footwork's so slippy I think it looks like they're dancing on ice. Don't miss the his-n-hers slides at 1:01 and 1:12!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOvpPRhYyng
And yes, the dance originated in this general area of the country.
These guys are ridiculously world-class dancers. The footwork's so slippy I think it looks like they're dancing on ice. Don't miss the his-n-hers slides at 1:01 and 1:12!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jOvpPRhYyng
And yes, the dance originated in this general area of the country.
23 February 2008
leisure on a rainy day
I've been off of blogging for about a year and have just resumed, so this morning I checked a few friends' blogs that I used to like to read. Yeah, most of them haven't posted for a year or so either. I wonder why we all opened blogs after college and then abandoned them about the same time? Most likely we all were trying to keep in touch with our relationship network during the post-college diaspora, and then had about the same timeline for face-to-face local relationship networks taking substance and replacing the online one. I guess that's a good thing.
This morning I'm not sure what to do with myself, which doesn't happen too often. Ironically, just last night I taught (or rather, facilitated discussion) at my small group Bible study and my topic was Playtime - a God-centered perspective on rest, recreation, and entertainment. The discussion was so good. Loved it. And here I am the next day with two hours before I meet someone and no idea what to do in this time. Perhaps... perhaps I shall just wander outside and breathe some of this beautiful fresh air. It's been rainy and drizzly for a couple weeks now, but today the sun is shining and everything has that wonderful rain-washed quality. Mmmm, don't you love the smell of wet pavement?
This morning I'm not sure what to do with myself, which doesn't happen too often. Ironically, just last night I taught (or rather, facilitated discussion) at my small group Bible study and my topic was Playtime - a God-centered perspective on rest, recreation, and entertainment. The discussion was so good. Loved it. And here I am the next day with two hours before I meet someone and no idea what to do in this time. Perhaps... perhaps I shall just wander outside and breathe some of this beautiful fresh air. It's been rainy and drizzly for a couple weeks now, but today the sun is shining and everything has that wonderful rain-washed quality. Mmmm, don't you love the smell of wet pavement?
14 February 2008
TiVo, Mr Tilney, and me
I spent this past Saturday through Wednesday housesitting for my boss while she and most of the office were out of town at the annual company convention. She has a lovely condo with an ocean view and two kitties and... TiVo. Now my boss and I have a good relationship, so she had lined up a bunch of things on the saved programming that she knew I would like, mostly 3 Jane Austen movies (PBS is in the middle of airing a bunch of new adaptations).
Understand that I don't watch television at home. DVD's, certainly, but not TV. I was shocked at how lulling and siren-ish that square black box is, especially when you can special-order and ffwd/rwd any TV show you like. There is a nearly inexhaustible feed of interesting and entertaining shows and well done films on cable that you could spend all your leisure time absorbing. And man does it make your "real" life seem less interesting! I'm reminded of a girl I knew in the theatre department who had a massive collection of movies and from what I could tell she spent most of her time sitting in front of her computer watching them. I'm sure inside her head it was filled with color and depth and excitement and human characters and emotion and everything that comes with watching a good story done well. But on the outside her life looked like that of a blob.
So I approach you, ladies [and gentlemen], in a moralizing strain. (By the way, that is a quote from Henry Tilney, who I now have a giddy bubbles-and-butterflies crush on thanks to TiVo's replay function.) ...moralizing strain: Life is definitely too short to watch television. At any rate, it sapped me of my inclination to do good things like cook or hang out with Jesus or work on my lesson plan for small group. It was good to have it for a day or two, but after that much better to get out of its reach.
The other part of this is that since everyone's been gone at the office, I have had almost nothing to do but read articles online for about three and a half days straight. It's like being paid to sit in a library! I read the complete online text of Northanger Abbey at gutenberg.org and a ton of cultural, literary, political, religious, and frivolous articles as well. My brain feels fatly fed. Yum yum. And my body is restless.
Conclusion? I love having my own little apartment under my domain, and I loved the Austen film adaptations but lost my head for a few days over too many stories (yes, it is possible to read too many novels, or watch too many movies), and I'm looking back on the week thinking about how a superabundance of entertainment and lack of occupation did not suit me at all.
Finally, if you can't imagine Britney Spears and Jane Austen happily merged, please click here.
Understand that I don't watch television at home. DVD's, certainly, but not TV. I was shocked at how lulling and siren-ish that square black box is, especially when you can special-order and ffwd/rwd any TV show you like. There is a nearly inexhaustible feed of interesting and entertaining shows and well done films on cable that you could spend all your leisure time absorbing. And man does it make your "real" life seem less interesting! I'm reminded of a girl I knew in the theatre department who had a massive collection of movies and from what I could tell she spent most of her time sitting in front of her computer watching them. I'm sure inside her head it was filled with color and depth and excitement and human characters and emotion and everything that comes with watching a good story done well. But on the outside her life looked like that of a blob.
So I approach you, ladies [and gentlemen], in a moralizing strain. (By the way, that is a quote from Henry Tilney, who I now have a giddy bubbles-and-butterflies crush on thanks to TiVo's replay function.) ...moralizing strain: Life is definitely too short to watch television. At any rate, it sapped me of my inclination to do good things like cook or hang out with Jesus or work on my lesson plan for small group. It was good to have it for a day or two, but after that much better to get out of its reach.
The other part of this is that since everyone's been gone at the office, I have had almost nothing to do but read articles online for about three and a half days straight. It's like being paid to sit in a library! I read the complete online text of Northanger Abbey at gutenberg.org and a ton of cultural, literary, political, religious, and frivolous articles as well. My brain feels fatly fed. Yum yum. And my body is restless.
Conclusion? I love having my own little apartment under my domain, and I loved the Austen film adaptations but lost my head for a few days over too many stories (yes, it is possible to read too many novels, or watch too many movies), and I'm looking back on the week thinking about how a superabundance of entertainment and lack of occupation did not suit me at all.
Finally, if you can't imagine Britney Spears and Jane Austen happily merged, please click here.
09 February 2008
Strictly Ballroom?
Just lately I've started swing dancing again - it's been about 3 or 4 years since I did it much, and I'd forgotten how ridiculously fun it is. I did ballroom dancing last fall and really enjoyed that, but now swing's doing it for me.
Tonight I went to a ballroom party/dance and you know, it just felt like the night never maxed itself out. In contrast with my night out Thursday when I Lindyed, swung, and Balboaed for three laughing, sweaty hours and left replete and happy, tonight was civilized and correct and didn't seem very social. My leg muscles are a bit tired but the rest of my body and my breathing is tense and frustrated, like it expected to be poured out and got left at the point of expectation with no pouring out. I am now eating wheat thins and chocolate to reach that satisfied feeling. Ha ha!!
I wonder if it has to do with being a performer, that I expect an evening of dancing to be something you give every last drop of energy to. Maybe a little bit. But I think I just like going swing dancing best. However, Strictly Ballroom is still one of my favorite movies.
Tonight I went to a ballroom party/dance and you know, it just felt like the night never maxed itself out. In contrast with my night out Thursday when I Lindyed, swung, and Balboaed for three laughing, sweaty hours and left replete and happy, tonight was civilized and correct and didn't seem very social. My leg muscles are a bit tired but the rest of my body and my breathing is tense and frustrated, like it expected to be poured out and got left at the point of expectation with no pouring out. I am now eating wheat thins and chocolate to reach that satisfied feeling. Ha ha!!
I wonder if it has to do with being a performer, that I expect an evening of dancing to be something you give every last drop of energy to. Maybe a little bit. But I think I just like going swing dancing best. However, Strictly Ballroom is still one of my favorite movies.
03 February 2008
A very quiet return
Greetings, friend. This stranger returns to the page.
My mind is full of images of twigs and leaves and the smell of damp earth. Good things. Clean, homely things. Simple things. My quiet weekend of rain and reading, baking and online chatting and more rain, has brought this on.
I read somewhere once that a man's prayer was that he would never lose his sense of wonder, and I pray that as well. I pray it for you too, if you're reading this. I can't think of many better gifts.
I would like to say that my aunt Ayala over at www.fiberfanatics.com is really amazing and I like her style, especially her blog, and also that the process of figuring out life and seeking contentment is mysterious and vexing but a fantastic adventure nonetheless, and that I enjoy being a woman, and an artist, and one who considers the inner workings of her mind. Also that I never want to exhaust myself in the pursuit of hipness and relevancy. In conclusion, Leaves of Grass is a brilliant title for a book of poetry.
My mind is full of images of twigs and leaves and the smell of damp earth. Good things. Clean, homely things. Simple things. My quiet weekend of rain and reading, baking and online chatting and more rain, has brought this on.
I read somewhere once that a man's prayer was that he would never lose his sense of wonder, and I pray that as well. I pray it for you too, if you're reading this. I can't think of many better gifts.
I would like to say that my aunt Ayala over at www.fiberfanatics.com is really amazing and I like her style, especially her blog, and also that the process of figuring out life and seeking contentment is mysterious and vexing but a fantastic adventure nonetheless, and that I enjoy being a woman, and an artist, and one who considers the inner workings of her mind. Also that I never want to exhaust myself in the pursuit of hipness and relevancy. In conclusion, Leaves of Grass is a brilliant title for a book of poetry.
25 March 2007
apologies
dear visitor,
I have apparently lost almost all interest in my blog - I'm sorry if you miss hearing my literary voice. It's just that I'm all involved in other stuff, and blogging is low priority, plus... it's been less and less appealing to put my heart out on an electronic page, so posts for the last months have been about things I don't really care about, so it all seems a bit pointless anyway. And then again as Bridget said when she stopped her blog (but I still have a link to it nevertheless), the home laptop is a lot less appealing when you've been sitting in front of a computer screen all day. Not officially, but because it looks like it's just happened, this blog is in a state of suspended animation until further notice.
But feel free to add recipes to http://forgetramen.wordpress.com cause that is my recipe-share blog and I love cooking :-)
cheers,
Julie
I have apparently lost almost all interest in my blog - I'm sorry if you miss hearing my literary voice. It's just that I'm all involved in other stuff, and blogging is low priority, plus... it's been less and less appealing to put my heart out on an electronic page, so posts for the last months have been about things I don't really care about, so it all seems a bit pointless anyway. And then again as Bridget said when she stopped her blog (but I still have a link to it nevertheless), the home laptop is a lot less appealing when you've been sitting in front of a computer screen all day. Not officially, but because it looks like it's just happened, this blog is in a state of suspended animation until further notice.
But feel free to add recipes to http://forgetramen.wordpress.com cause that is my recipe-share blog and I love cooking :-)
cheers,
Julie
07 February 2007
03 February 2007
a smile, a ray of sun
Some things I thought were important this week: tasting the scents on the air during my nighttime runs. chopping up 5 pounds of meat for future use. teaching my first Bible study to a group at church. finding out I was overqualified for the first temp job I applied for. settling on the 900 minute phone plan. getting my money back from my Australian bank. petting kitties at the Petsmart adoption center. overwriting painful memories at SDSU. deciding not to encourage someone who likes me. hearing about a friend's day. handling my oral fidgets with unshelled raw sunflower seeds. seeing an old sort-of friend without it turning into a heavy deal. receiving reassurance about an old doubt. praying powerfully on tuesday. I am glad of my week. God is good. all. the time.
26 January 2007
stupid things I have done lately
-driving without my seatbelt on (for brief periods of time) (intentional)
-having a 2006 registration sticker on my car until late January 2007 (laziness)
-washing my car at a do-it-yourself place, spending $7.50 in quarters, and ending with plenty of dirt and soap scum still left on it (a combination of inexperience and 9 months' accumulated dirt)
-stopping at a red light and then going through it because the motion of the cars turning left made me think we were all going (unintentional)
-leaving my right sideview mirror very badly adjusted so that I had a blind spot on that side (unintentional)
-nearly changing lanes into a car on my left (twice) (I looked first...) (unintentional)
-coasting through a red light (at least I think it was red- I barely noticed there was a stoplight there at all until I was passing under it) because I was looking for my freeway entrance (there was no one around and it was night) (unintentional)
-mangaged to get from my small group leader's house and onto the freeway at 9:00 at night before realizing that I was driving without any headlights (unintentional, and unbelievable)
I fear I have gone stupid about driving. I have been trying really hard to focus, look, and be aware, plus going over what I learned about driving, but it seems like most days I do something potentially dangerous or illegal. Not sure what to do about this. Ideas??
-having a 2006 registration sticker on my car until late January 2007 (laziness)
-washing my car at a do-it-yourself place, spending $7.50 in quarters, and ending with plenty of dirt and soap scum still left on it (a combination of inexperience and 9 months' accumulated dirt)
-stopping at a red light and then going through it because the motion of the cars turning left made me think we were all going (unintentional)
-leaving my right sideview mirror very badly adjusted so that I had a blind spot on that side (unintentional)
-nearly changing lanes into a car on my left (twice) (I looked first...) (unintentional)
-coasting through a red light (at least I think it was red- I barely noticed there was a stoplight there at all until I was passing under it) because I was looking for my freeway entrance (there was no one around and it was night) (unintentional)
-mangaged to get from my small group leader's house and onto the freeway at 9:00 at night before realizing that I was driving without any headlights (unintentional, and unbelievable)
I fear I have gone stupid about driving. I have been trying really hard to focus, look, and be aware, plus going over what I learned about driving, but it seems like most days I do something potentially dangerous or illegal. Not sure what to do about this. Ideas??
19 January 2007
a series of punchlines
I can't come up with anything as immediately satisfying as my carne asada burrito was for me this afternoon, with guacamole and hot sauce, at 3pm when I was most ravenous, from a hole-in-the-wall drivethru Mexican restaurant that was painted in wide stripes of yellow and red. Don't talk to me about questionable food sources and cockroaches; they had an "A" grade from the health department posted in the window.
My new boyfriend is named Ikea. He takes me beautiful places but also takes my money.
Verizon Man - who is he? What does he do? His onesie would indicate he's an auto mechanic, his manicure would indicate he's a jewelry salesman, his glasses and haircut insinuate that he's really a cooler-than-thou hipster, but since I've come back from Australia he's taken to showing tooth when he smiles, and when he does that he just looks like a print model who's sick of being the face of Verizon but keeps doing it cause he signed a contract.
My new boyfriend is named Ikea. He takes me beautiful places but also takes my money.
Verizon Man - who is he? What does he do? His onesie would indicate he's an auto mechanic, his manicure would indicate he's a jewelry salesman, his glasses and haircut insinuate that he's really a cooler-than-thou hipster, but since I've come back from Australia he's taken to showing tooth when he smiles, and when he does that he just looks like a print model who's sick of being the face of Verizon but keeps doing it cause he signed a contract.
10 January 2007
I may not be addicted to transitions, but I sure get enough of them.
Yesterday was what they would have called ‘travel day’ if they gave you travel days around the vacations at Hillsdale. It made me sympathize with all those people from Alaska (yeah, all two of those people) and the southwest who had to zigzag across the country to get to Michigan and college. It wasn’t really that bad, but it did take a while. This was partly due to my own choice. I was supposed to go Detroit-Minneapolis-San Diego, and when I got to the Twin Cities they had overbooked and were offering $300 vouchers to anyone who would give up their seat and take a later flight. As I had no particular time I had to be in San Diego I took this excellent offer, so I got home at 8pm instead of the original 1pm, and had another leg added to my journey. Detroit-Minneapolis-Seattle-San Diego. Probably another hour and a half of flight time. But, you know, it was good, cause it meant I achieved the following firsts:
-free airline ticket (probably to be used for the family reunion in July)
-sleeping in an airport (1 ½ hours dozing during my Minneapolis layover, much welcomed after 4 hours of sleep the previous night)
-not one but TWO flights seated in first class! (they upgraded me for being a volunteer! My opinion is yes it’s a little bit nicer, roomier, but not worth the extra prices. Free alcohol if you like that but I wasn’t drinking. They do take your coat and hang it up for you, which I enjoyed.)
So I moved into my apartment! Well, more accurately I met Tunisia, parked my car, hauled my bedding and suitcase upstairs, and fell asleep on the sofa in my room. It’s 4 ½ feet long. Comfortable, but not really any room to stretch one’s legs out J Buying a bed is the first thing on my list. I’ve got plenty to keep me busy this week, and I think it’s going to be fun unpacking all my stuff I haven’t seen for 9 months. Kind of like Christmas. At my house we have all these unique ornaments for the Christmas tree, from my mom’s travels in Europe, from this cool store from when we lived in L.A., and recent acquisitions from World Market. It’s always exciting to decorate the tree and find old friends as you unwrap each ornament. I figure moving in is going to be kind of like that.
That’s my situation at the moment! I feel like an explorer. Watch this space!!!
-free airline ticket (probably to be used for the family reunion in July)
-sleeping in an airport (1 ½ hours dozing during my Minneapolis layover, much welcomed after 4 hours of sleep the previous night)
-not one but TWO flights seated in first class! (they upgraded me for being a volunteer! My opinion is yes it’s a little bit nicer, roomier, but not worth the extra prices. Free alcohol if you like that but I wasn’t drinking. They do take your coat and hang it up for you, which I enjoyed.)
So I moved into my apartment! Well, more accurately I met Tunisia, parked my car, hauled my bedding and suitcase upstairs, and fell asleep on the sofa in my room. It’s 4 ½ feet long. Comfortable, but not really any room to stretch one’s legs out J Buying a bed is the first thing on my list. I’ve got plenty to keep me busy this week, and I think it’s going to be fun unpacking all my stuff I haven’t seen for 9 months. Kind of like Christmas. At my house we have all these unique ornaments for the Christmas tree, from my mom’s travels in Europe, from this cool store from when we lived in L.A., and recent acquisitions from World Market. It’s always exciting to decorate the tree and find old friends as you unwrap each ornament. I figure moving in is going to be kind of like that.
That’s my situation at the moment! I feel like an explorer. Watch this space!!!
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